I occasionally react to the same issue very differently.
Some days, I find it easy to just overcome problems, and other days I find myself in the middle of an emotional shit storm where everything just seems to go wrong and I feel like a very unlucky bystander who got caught up in the middle of things. On those days, I find it particularly difficult to be the observer of my emotions and not believe everything my insecure mind is telling me. Can you relate?
Why is it that on some days it is easy to not get overwhelmed, and on others, it is impossible to detach from our feelings?
The main reason is biology.
We like to think that we are all grown-up, rational human beings, but we are hardly ever aware of how powerfully our biology dictates how we feel. Have you ever seen a kid who is so tired that they get upset about everything? Have you ever tried to tell a sleepy kid that they are very sensitive because they need to sleep? Yep-that kid is all of us.
Before you make a decision, reply to the email that upset you so much, or send a snappy message back to your friend, check-in with yourself. By checking in with your body and answering the following questions, you create a more objective perspective and find the ability to respond rather than react.
Ask yourself: Am I hungry? Am I thirsty? Have I had enough rest recently? What’s my body temperature like? Am I too cold or hot? Are my shoes uncomfortable? What’s wrong? Speak to yourself as you would to a child, with compassion and understanding.
This may sound too simple, but we tend to overlook how we feel (in our bodies) and go straight to our emotions. By pausing and tuning into our bodily sensations, we can identify uncomfortable feelings that may affect our decision-making and our mood in general.
Ongoing neglect of our basic biological needs (rest, nourishing food, plenty of water, time for play and rest, creativity, community) will affect our general mood and can become a trait that’s difficult to shed.
Our perception of the world also guides our moods and emotions. We all construct our view of the world and others based on our experiences throughout life. That is why you may not have the same fears as your best friend, for example. This does not mean that your feelings are not valid–it just means we all have different life experiences!
Perception is embodied and that is what makes it feel so real. Your whole body feels it. And that is why there is no way of overcoming the habits you developed based on those perceptions using your mind, changing your mindset, switching your thoughts. The mindset change techniques only work on a surface level. In order to create long-lasting change or paradigm shift, you need to create a new perception and then make that perception embodied.
How do we change that perception and embody it? By using somatic practices, nervous system regulation, and daily practice! We at Centrd Life are here to guide you on this journey. We are launching our first self-study course in September that can help you develop the embodied awareness you need, and will be packed with practical tools on how to get those biological needs met on a daily basis.
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